What would you do if a relationship you had depended on for a decade ended? How would you deal with a situation that tests your limits? At Alabastron I faced myself and how I had been living life and now I am in pursuit of living a limitless life.

I had known about Alabastron years ago when my aunt did Renewing Self season 3. I was quite young then and didn't think much about it. Years later I mentioned it to a good friend of mine. She went ahead and did it. She would prompt me to take the program, but I always had an excuse not to. Deep in my heart, I knew I wanted to do it, but it took me awhile to make the step. I admired the peace Mwende had, and having hit rock bottom, I decided to give it a shot. Furthermore, Mwende believed it would help me and that's all it took. God bless her soul!!

Recently I was lost. I was battling an autoimmune condition (Fibromyalgia), and just ended a 10 year relationship. I felt like I was broken physically, mentally and emotionally and there wasn't anything I could do. With my health deteriorating and my heart broken, I had lost all zeal for life and merely existed. Honestly, I was just SO TIRED!! Ouch! [...]

We are products of the societies that brought us up. These societies shape what we belief and the perspective we have for what is right or wrong, normal or abnormal, good or bad. However, living life to please other people, robs us off the joy of living a life where we make decisions based on what is right for us. Esther (not her real name) shares her story on the cost of living life to please other people.

I always believed education would liberate me to achieve all my dreams in life. So, when given an opportunity I poured myself to it and succeeded. I graduated with a first class honors degree in campus. Consequently, I received a scholarship to pursue a master's degree!! It was fulfilling!!

You can imagine what this meant for me. I would take an opportunity to grow in my education with the seriousness it deserves. These kinds of opportunities were like tickets from a life I never wanted to live to a life of my dreams. I would do anything necessary as long as it would grant me the life I had always dreamt of. My passion to get an education was greatly driven by this motive. [...]

I leant about Alabastron from my internship. It did not make sense for me because I thought it was for women with issues. I thought that my issues were minor. Through the program, I began opening up as the process you get to meet with the deepest self of your entire existence. This sharing gave me a sense of calm and I would feel safe.

I began having the confidence to open up about issues that hurt me. My relationship with my mother was strenuous as she would share intimate matters in regard to my father that I felt drained. However she would always tell me that I am a firstborn hence I will have to endure what she was sharing with me. It left me feeling violated, helpless and disturbed. These words I had been hearing since my childhood.

“You are a firstborn. You must mature so that your siblings have someone to look up to.”

These words forced me to always live up to standards and life perspective of other people in my life. I would end up feeling powerless and timid. This would show up in how I was working even on tasks on my area of competence. I was always defensive when receiving feedback with an intention to prove the other person wrong. I would lose my voice in some instances hence I was not able to speak out my opinions and ideas. [...]

Have you ever followed a certain script in life convinced that you are on the right track not knowing that you could have much better in life than just a script? I was that woman who followed a script in life. I never knew any better.

I learned about Alabastron to me. God surely bless her soul!! from a neighbor. I was eager to help my sister who I felt was struggling with relationships around work, friends and family. However, when I shared this situation with my neighbor, she suggested Alabastron. Fortunately, when I goggled it, I realized that the organization had an Open Day in two weeks time. So, I resolved to accompany my sister.

During the Open Day, I could see myself being described by Laimani Bidali. This Open day led to my decision to take the program. I realized that I had been following the societal life cycle of a woman. Later on a friend who had attended the Open Day encouraged me to take the program as I did not have to be facing an issue to the program. [...]

Have you ever been caught up with the usual activities in your life? You know, getting up, bathing, getting dressed, preparing the children, and then showing up at work because you have to! Well, that was me doing life beaten up; sinking every moment yet constantly smiling telling myself everything is ok until I did Alabastron.

One normal morning, late last year after arriving at work, my boss who is also a friend mentioned Alabastron to me. God surely bless her soul!!

“I think you need Alabastron.” Trizah said.

“I think you need Alabastron.” Trizah said.

I honestly did not hear her well, I heard something like Alabaster. I didn’t care!! Later on, I grew interest and searched for the organization on internet. I researched everything I could get a hold of. Social media, the website and even You Tube. I resolved to attend the Alabastron Open Day then broke the news to Trizah

“By the way I attended the Open Day.” I mentioned swiftly.

To my surprise, she sent me money for registration and even paid the full amount for me!! I had been going through a series of depression and emotional abuse. This showed up at my work. I would always say yes to everything and get an outburst. One day I stormed a manager’s office unaware I was angry, he request if I can do breathing exercises. Most of my close friends could easily tell I was not ok. But what hit me hard was a question from my six year old son. [...]